Jarret, Kenny, Berta, and Heidi created a website, GoldenGooseGetter.net. They are on a mission to find “the next big thing”. All of their friends continually tell them how crazy this is. That they should focus on something that would provide better support for their families and help chip away at their student loans. Maybe they could become truck drivers, welders, or professional cornhole players. Sure, the last option isn’t a gimmie, but it is more of a sure thing than their current plan. The quartet had to move in together four months ago to keep their dream alive. Their stockpile canned meats and saltine crackers has been really hit hard. Kenny has been eyeballing Berta’s leather shoes. Dreaming up of several ways they could be prepared that would enable the friends to eat a few more days.
Heidi had enough. She was tired of sharing a place with her friends. There was too much of a difference in their hygiene and housekeeping. She grew tired of reaching for a clean towel after a shower only to find a damp dank sour substitute. Heidi was going to insist that they stop this madness and get real jobs. Maybe she could find a job in sales. She was pretty good talking to people.
Jarret had also had enough. He felt like he was doing the majority of the work. He hadn’t been busting his hump learning how to code in order to work at a failing website. His skills are in demand. Jarret could have a higher quality of life. He could buy all of the Zapps potato chips he wanted. He also wouldn’t have to feel guilty about walking around naked and singing songs by the Goo Goo Dolls if he had his own place.
The friends were scheduled to meet to discuss their business. Jarret and Heidi knew this was going to be a hard meeting. They were dreading it. They didn’t know that they were on the same page. They thought they were going to have a hard time winning over their friends.
Berta had noticed a difference in her friends lately. She could tell that Jarret and Heidi had cooled on the idea of their website. She didn’t want to see them go. She knew she would have to do something drastic.
Kenny brought his friends used cups full of hot water. Jarret and Heidi didn’t seem to notice. Berta took a sip and grimaced.
“Why did you give us dirty water?”
Kenny looked sheepish and replied. “We’re out of coffee. I thought I might be able to bring out a little coffee flavor if I reused cups”
Jarret stood up and cleared his throat. Just then Berta swept up behind him and held a warm cloth to his mouth. He folded onto the floor. The other friends heard the noise and stared at Berta. She sprung over to Heidi and then to Kenny. All of her friends were out cold.
“Well…I guess I should have thought of what I would do next. I’ve just delayed the conversation and made it a little more awkward.”
Berta rushed to the whiteboard where her friends had been collecting ideas. Maybe if she worked really hard, she could come up with something to save the website. Maybe if she could just dig a little deeper.
Berta paused at the white board. She heard the most unusual sound. Bump, bump, bump, bump. What was that? She turned around to see their Roomba backing up and running into her friends’ heads. It was stuck. However, Berta was no longer stuck.
When Jarret, Kenny and Heidi came to they smelled hot delicious pizzas and saw balloons and coolers of beer. Their heads ached and they were more than a little confused. Berta, handed them plates of pizza and glasses of beer. She passed them each a small black folder. She sat back and smiled. She had done it. She had revolutionized the robot vacuum cleaner industry. She had figured out a way to prevent vacuum’s from ever getting stuck again and she had introduced salon quality hair care. So yes, the friends’ heads ached, but their hair had never looked better.